I have the day off today. I'm grateful for that.
Carl is at work so I have the entire day to myself. We ate not great last night. I'm still holding on to the last ditch effort of New Years to shove so many calories in my gullet before I start tackling this shit for real.
To be frank, I was avoiding it.
So I woke up and realized that instead of lazying around in sweatpants until I meet up with my Mom later, I could start today. So I did.
I flung myself out of my warm bed with a sleepy, snuggly puppy and actually put on my pants, top, and dug my sneakers out of a not yet unpacked tote. I was ready. #operationlookhotnaked here I come.
Then I opened my Nike+ app.
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....have I really not run in 16 weeks? I knew it had been a long time with the move, getting sick, and the snow... but 16 weeks? Holy shit, I am going to die.
I knew it was going to be really, really fucking bad. And I won't sugarcoat it...it was.
As I was running, I thought about how I would type this out. Do I self-deprecate because that's how I feel? No, that makes it look like I just want attention. Do I put a positive spin on it?
Well, I settled on brutal fucking honesty, so here we go.
I started out feeling great. Like, whoa, woohoo! It's like no time passed at all! That kind of great.
That lasted a grand total of 30 seconds when I had to run up a hill. I felt my legs turn to jelly and my body transform into a 1000 lb log. I started wheezing and constantly having to spit out that absolutely disgusting thick phlegm that fills your throat and makes you feel like you can't breathe.
I was a hard breathing, snotty mess. And I hadn't even run a freaking mile.
I ended up resorting to my standard 'run a song, walk a song" method and it still didn't even work well. I ended up walking a lot. It's pathetic. I feel pretty pathetic.
But it's Day 1. I'm leaning on the positive spin simply because I've been at Day 1 before.
Day 1 blows and it blows for a reason. If Day 1 were easy, why would we continue? Why would we strive to make it easier? Or work to challenge ourselves? It has to be hard so we feel like we have something worth conquering.
It sucks that I let my progress stray so far that I feel like I'm back here. That's my fault. But I also know that it won't be like that forever. Someday soon, I'll re-read this post and laugh at myself for feeling small and helpless because I am capable of so much. For now though? I need some encouragement.
The view doesn't hurt either.
• Relaxation
• Beach
• All-inclusive
• Nightlife
• Good food
• Minimal kids/spring break college
Carl is at work so I have the entire day to myself. We ate not great last night. I'm still holding on to the last ditch effort of New Years to shove so many calories in my gullet before I start tackling this shit for real.
To be frank, I was avoiding it.
So I woke up and realized that instead of lazying around in sweatpants until I meet up with my Mom later, I could start today. So I did.
I flung myself out of my warm bed with a sleepy, snuggly puppy and actually put on my pants, top, and dug my sneakers out of a not yet unpacked tote. I was ready. #operationlookhotnaked here I come.
Then I opened my Nike+ app.
....have I really not run in 16 weeks? I knew it had been a long time with the move, getting sick, and the snow... but 16 weeks? Holy shit, I am going to die.
I knew it was going to be really, really fucking bad. And I won't sugarcoat it...it was.
As I was running, I thought about how I would type this out. Do I self-deprecate because that's how I feel? No, that makes it look like I just want attention. Do I put a positive spin on it?
Well, I settled on brutal fucking honesty, so here we go.
I started out feeling great. Like, whoa, woohoo! It's like no time passed at all! That kind of great.
That lasted a grand total of 30 seconds when I had to run up a hill. I felt my legs turn to jelly and my body transform into a 1000 lb log. I started wheezing and constantly having to spit out that absolutely disgusting thick phlegm that fills your throat and makes you feel like you can't breathe.
I was a hard breathing, snotty mess. And I hadn't even run a freaking mile.
I ended up resorting to my standard 'run a song, walk a song" method and it still didn't even work well. I ended up walking a lot. It's pathetic. I feel pretty pathetic.
By the end, I could swear my lungs were actually on fire. They burned with such intensity that it radiated up my ears. I walked pretty much the whole way back because it's all my body could handle.
The body that was running 5k distances this past summer.
But it's Day 1. I'm leaning on the positive spin simply because I've been at Day 1 before.
Day 1 blows and it blows for a reason. If Day 1 were easy, why would we continue? Why would we strive to make it easier? Or work to challenge ourselves? It has to be hard so we feel like we have something worth conquering.
It sucks that I let my progress stray so far that I feel like I'm back here. That's my fault. But I also know that it won't be like that forever. Someday soon, I'll re-read this post and laugh at myself for feeling small and helpless because I am capable of so much. For now though? I need some encouragement.
The view doesn't hurt either.
On an unrelated note, Carl and I set a deadline to pick our honeymoon destination by last night and we didn't end up doing it. What a surprise. I need help!
Tell me where you went on your honeymoon and why it was awesome. We're thinking of Jamaica, Barbados, or Turks and Caicos.
What we want out of a honeymoon:
• Beach
• All-inclusive
• Nightlife
• Good food
• Minimal kids/spring break college
10 comments:
That amazing Cape view is so motivating! And you already know this, it'll get easier as you get stronger again. A tip I use for getting back to running is taking the stairs a lot. I work in a 5 floor bldg but on the 1st floor. Every time I get up to go to the bathroom (sorry tmi, whatever) like 3 times a day I run the stairs to the 5th floor and back, then go to the restroom. Something about the stairs makes my lungs rockstars, which makes running a million times easier without you know, actually running to make it happen LOL.
For my honeymoon like 7 yrs ago I went somewhere I never thought I'd go and LOVED IT. we went to Mexico. I was very anti-Mexico because all I knew was cancun, spring break, foam parties, tripple kissing body shots, stuff from Tv.
We stayed in Riviera Maya (mayan riviera) and it was FABULOUS! PS I was a tourism major/I'm an event planner now so I'm the biggest hotel snob EVER. So I was SHOCKED when we could stay in 4-5 diamond (5 star) in this gorgeous paradise in mexico for like 1/3 what we'd pay anywhere else. We stayed in one of the Palace resorts (an all-inclusive). We did an adults only one which I'd recommend for a honeymoon. You know, no kids in the pools or anywhere.
My favorite part was the Palace resorts offer free shuttles to all the other Palace resorts... AND you can eat/drink for free at each, take part in the free snorkling or other activities at each, etc. So during the week we were there, I think we went to 3 or 4 other resorts as well.
So I say don't take Mexico off your list like I almost did. The water is sooo blue, the sand is sooo white. It was paradise!
Great job getting back out there. Now... can you do it for me too? Thanks! Haha.
That view is effing AMAZING! Totally jealous!!!!
And for your honeymoon, I say you ditch Big C and we go somewhere delightful. Cool?
I'm finally scoping out your blog, and I've gotta say: you are amazing for being so committed to and honest about your health! Thanks to my lively asthma, every time I fall off the wagon and start running again, I feel like a contestant on The Biggest Loser. Like, on their very first work out. So, needless to say, I have to limit my runs-- or else death is inevitable-- to one for the first week. My sister crafted this plan and I love it. It's a short yet meaningful distance, and it's over before you know it.
*one MILE every day for the first week
AMAZING AMAZING view!!!! Good for you for getting out there girl. Day 1 SUCKS and you pushed through. Yes, even walking counts. You were out there barely able to breath. That is serious effort. I wish you the best of luck of building up your endurance. You WILL do it and you WILL look back on this post and laugh. Congrats for all you did today!
Turks and cacos (I know I am spelling that shit wrong) would be amazing!!! I'm jealous.
I wish I could give advice on ANY of those places! Alas... it's still but a goal to make it there someday.
Good for you, deciding there was no better time than TODAY to throw yourself back into a routine! It seems like several of us in the blogosphere are doing that right now. Your view is a definite silver lining to all the huffing and puffing. Absolutely breathtaking.
We honeymooned in Barbados. It was awesome! It's inexpensive, warm, beautiful! I could go on and on. I have a post on my blog about our time there and there's so much more that didn't make it on the blog. We stayed on the east side in Bathsheba. The bus rides to the more touristy areas was cheap $1 and easy to figure out. But then when we wanted seclusion we had it because there are very few places to stay on that side.
Good for you for getting back out there! I hate running so I feel your pain.
You can do it girl! The beginning is absolutely ALWAYS the worst. It is so hard to get back in the groove. Just think about how GOOD you will feel when you are back running longer distances. Imagine how you want to look and feel and just think of what you need to get you there. You can do it!!!
I didn't run all summer. Not once from June until October.
And then in October when a friend gave me a treadmill, I got on, and...well. Yeah. It wasn't pretty.
Sad thing is? Two months later and I'm still logging 14-minute miles. I'm am SUCH a sucky runner. I have been since I started, but MAN does a few months off really ruin the entire damned thing.
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